Why Guys Make Better Friends Than Girls

 

"A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you."--Elbert Hubbard

Girls, girl drama, rumors, whispers, girls whispering rumors to one another, secretive glances at each other...Drive. Me. Nuts!

Luckily, this has all gotten progressively better in the past, oh, five days, but girls just can't spend a day without spreading gossip, true or not, and I always want to shout and go, "Can you please shut UP?"

But no, they can't, though from laziness or a genuine inability to keep themselves from whispering said gossip to others remains undetermined. What I constantly marvel at, though, is why girls can't seem to form intelligent conversations with one another?

To me, I mostly hear something like:

 Diva Friend 1: "So, like, oh my God, yesterday Angela got asked out-"

Diva Friend 2: "Oh my God! By who?!"

Me: "Does it matter?"

Diva Friend 2: "Well, God, Katie! Of COURSE it matters who Angela is dating! Because I heard she got asked out by-"

Diva Friend 1: "William Shakespeare!"

Me: "Um, guys? That's a playwright from the 1500s...he's not exactly alive and datable, if you know what I mean-"

Diva Friend 1: "Oh, Katie, you are so silly! I mean that kid who wrote that play for our English class!"

Me: *Groans and puts hands over her eyes*

Diva Friend 2: "Like, totally! Oh my gosh, William Shakespeare is SO dreamy! I'd totally love to get into his pants..."

Me: "Ugh, I lost my appetite. Have fun you guys."

Diva Friends 1 & 2: "'Kay, then, Katie! Bye!" *Pause* "Don't tell Angela what we were saying, okay? She doesn't need to know."

Me: *Fake smile* "Of course. My lips are sealed."

Although, even as I had quite a sarcastic tone going on, I was still serious. Unlike them, I have no problem with keeping my lips firmly closed with a secret.

Amazing how my gossip 'friends' got told more secrets that they unleashed ten minutes later than I got with my lips sealed for eternity.

Really, what's up with that? Not that I'm terribly depressed not knowing that Person A had it going on in the janitor's closet or that Person Q just got plastic surgery for her dog, but seriously--I, out of anyone, should know these things! When people go to gossip queens as secret keepers, they're either totally misinformed and/or ignorant, or they just want everyone to know it.

Either way, this brings me to the main focus of my post's title: boys really do make better friends than girls. I always used to remember being told that when girls get into arguments with each other, they go to making each other miserable as revenge. Secretive, bitchy, and totally uncalled for. Boys, as I was told, beat each other up or got into an arm wrestling match to prove who's more macho and then pigged out on food and played video games for five hours.

Honestly, this isn't too far-fetched when you look at boys vs. girls. So that's why, for most of my life, I've enjoyed the company of guys much better than diva girls. Hey, whoever I can hang out with who know my idiosyncrasies, let me eat as much as I want, actually listen to my problems (and don't pass it off to anyone else afterwards!) and still like me anyway is a good friend in my book.

And to hell with anyone who disagrees!